The Summer Challenge

Whew!  Since Callen's birthday in February, life has been a blur.  Laughs, tears, vacation, yard work, blueberry picking, birthdays, BBQ's, friends ... And here we are ending the third week of June!  How did that happen?!  Meanwhile these cuties are growing up.

I had intentions of writing this post around Memorial Day...to invite you on a summer challenge with me.  But...I didn't.

So here's the challenge:  
Reading the Bible in 90 days! 
1-ish hour a day, 6 days a week.

(Deep breath cuz I know you might be in a panic.).

Adventure...

What's going on?

Do you not know? Have you not heard?

Port of Long Beach 2009 (Drew)

These verses have nothing to do with Veteran's Day, but they remind me that I am not forgotten in times of crisis. And it is the first thing I think of when I see the picture below. If you are familiar with the passage, read them slowly to let the reality expose any doubts you have about God's faithfulness.

“To whom will you compare me?

    Or who is my equal?” says the Holy One.

Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens:

Who created all these?

He who brings out the starry host one by one

and calls forth each of them by name.

Because of his great power and mighty strength,

not one of them is missing.

Why do you complain, Jacob?

Why do you say, Israel,

“My way is hidden from the Lord;

my cause is disregarded by my God”?

Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary

and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the Lord

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

 they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:25-31

Flathead Lake 2013 (Ben)

Start this week knowing that you are not forgotten by God.  It sounds simplistic or elementary.    For me, it is a reminder that while my prayers may be unanswered, they are not forgotten.  While I grow weary in waiting, the Lord will renew my strength.  He will remain faithful.

The Adventures of Callen and Aubs

Me (to Drew): Callen and Aubs ready to go?
Drew (pause): Do you realize what you just said?
Me: No, what?
Drew: Callen and Aubs, sounds like Calvin and Hobbs the cartoon.
Me: Oh...
Drew: You should rename the blog "The Adventures of Callen and Aubs," then start another blog with all your thinking stuff. (pause) On second thought, you would lose all your followers because they want to see the kids.


I've been found out!  I use my family (mostly my children) to draw in readers (mainly friends and family).  I post primarily about family life, but throw in the occasional philosophical, theological and political post.

While I like sharing pictures of the family, I want friends, family and random readers to think more deeply about their beliefs, to consider the implications of worldviews, and to engage the culture around them.  

I won't assert to have all the answers.  Many times I have my own set of questions.  I'm not the best writer, even if I don't have sleep deprivation as an excuse. But it is a conversation that must be started.  For me, the conversation starts inside my over-analytic mind in response to world events, politics, books, articles, conversations, etc... then at home with Drew, friends and family, and sometimes continues over to the blog.


Another question you might be asking: "Aubs?" Interesting nickname for Aubrey."  Drew and I had no intention of calling Aubrey anything other than Aubrey.  But Callen has been creating names for everyone: Nana-->Nanny,
Sam-->Sammy,
Tim-->Timmy,
Dan-->Danny,
Kevin-->Kevy, etc.
Then one day he announced that Aubrey's "other" name was Aubs.  For awhile only he was allowed to call her Aubs.  No one else.

(Her most recent nickname is "Baby Owie", also from Callen.  Initially, I thought this was an intentional slurring of the sounds of her name.  But it refers to the two "owies" on her nose from Callen.)

So, there you have it: full disclosure about the blog and the origin of Aubs.

But here is the good stuff, the reason you read:  a few adventures from Callen and Aubs...

Getting ready for Montana

Solving the world's problems

Going on a bear hunt

Yep!  We actually spotted a bear. (Kudos to Drew)

Strangely Dim

As a mom to two young kids, life is Crazy. Exhausting.  Overwhelming.
The sleepless nights, the long days, the endless chores, the spilled milk have taken its toll.  My mental capacity has plummeted.  The time I'm able to spend on  hobbies, books, exercise, and friends have also decreased.  I get discouraged Praying. Praying. Praying. for the same things, people, and circumstances.

I'm not complaining.  I love my job as a SAHM and am thankful for my kids, my husband, my life.  But this is my reality.

My mom sent me a link to this song awhile back and I recently stumbled across it on another blog.

Strangely Dim by Francesca Battistelli

So I continue to wait on dreams that I know came from Him, until I know it's time to move forward.

Meanwhile...
The laundry will wait until midnight.
The oatmeal will stay on the floor until after bedtime.
The front yard will remain a sand weed box.
Phone calls will be unanswered.

I have hearts to mold, shape and grow.

The mess and chaos doesn't have to control me, my attitude, or my actions.
Some day I will look back on these days of spilled milk, watermelon juice, and dirt tracks and smile.

Encouragement in the trenches

To the modern day abolitionists,
To those fighting infanticide,
To those fighting to pull others out of addiction and desperation,
And to all others who give of themselves and resources fighting injustice:

Remember: It is God who brings the victory!  Full confidence in God is the only way to persevere and keep sane.  Keep being obedient to Him who called you into this work.

From John Wesley on his death bed to William Wilberforce, as recorded in 7 Men (Eric Metaxes pg. 47):

Dear Sir,
Unless the divine power has raised you up to be as Athanasius contra mundum [against the world], I see not how you can go through your glorious enterprise in opposing that execrable villainy, which is the scandal of religion, of England, and of human nature.  Unless God has raised you up for this very thing, you will be worn out by the opposition of men and devils.

But if God be for you, who can be against you? Are all of them stronger than God? O be not weary of well doing.  Go on, in the name of God and in the power of His might, till even American slavery (the vilest that ever saw the sun) shall vanish away before it.

Reading this morning a tract wrote by a poor African, I was particularly struck by that circumstance, that a man who has a black skin, being wronged or outraged by a white man, can have no redress; it being a law in all our Colonies that the oath of a black against a white goes for nothing.  What villainy is this!

That He who has guided you from youth up may continue to strengthen you in this and all things is the prayer of, dear sir, 

Your affectionate servant,

John Wesley

Flashback Friday

Drew was a crier, so Ben wore earmuffs...

The irony...Aubrey is crying: Cal runs to get the ear muffs, unprompted.

Callen: Look, it's Callen.
Me: No, that's Dad.

This is what he is going to look like, soon...

Sneak peak of Aubrey, 27 years ago. (except more hair)

Looks like we have procreated mini-me's!

O, Hell, where is your sting?

Growing up I always envisioned Hell as a fiery cave with red, devilish figures running with pitch forks.  My biggest objective to Hell was the idea of living in a scorching desert for all eternity (not a fan of 120 F weather), but I found Hell neither appealing nor repulsive.

Over the past couple years I've realized that my idea of Hell was completely wrong.  Yes, it maybe HOT with creepy figures working for Satan, but that wasn't the worst of it.

What if Hell encompassed everything that God was not?  

What if Hell was a place completely absent of God and attributes that represent God?

If God is love, then Hell is a place where hate is fully matured: murder.

If love is patient, kind, etc. (1 Cor 13), then Hell is full of selfishness, envy, and pride.

If the fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control (Gal 5:22-23), then Hell is hate, sorrow, disharmony, frustration, cruelty, wickedness, apathy, and chaos.

If disobedience to God (sin) fully manifested leads to death (Rom 6:28), then Hell is a place of constant death and suffering.  Eternal suffering at the maximum human capacity.

Now THAT sounds like Hell!

Why do I think my second description is a closer representation of Hell? 
Because Jesus endured unimaginable, undeserved suffering.  He took our place.  In order for him to "suffer anguish, be despised, and rejected", He must have been saving us from something terrible. More than a fiery cave.

Why pay attention to Easter?

The validity of the Christian faith hangs on this one holiday.  Prove that the resurrection never happened, and Christianity is nothing more than another philosophy of morality.

"And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith.  More than that, we are then found to be false witnesses about God, for we have testified about God that he raised Christ for the dead...And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile; you are still in your sins.  Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ are lost.  If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men" 1 Cor 15:12-19

Casting Crowns- "Glorious Day"

Day 5 and counting

Here it is Monday, February 25, and still no signs of Baby Miller.   Tentative induction date is March 1.  Here are a few highlights of how Cal and I keep busy and distracted during the week:

Blowing bubbles

"Rockin' out!"

Staying in pj's until noon

Day 1 overdue--headed to the doctor

Cal after prayers last night: Baby coming next week.

Me: Yes, baby is coming this week.

Cal: Baby coming soon.

Me: Yes, baby coming soon.

Cal: Baby come when wake up.

Me: I don't know if baby will be here in the morning.  I hope so.

-------

Friday, I was wearing a baggy sweatshirt and sitting in a position that didn't clearly show I was pregnant.  I said something to Cal about the baby, and he looked at my belly PANICKED.  And came over to see if I still had a baby...Through the eyes of a child.

------

At my doc appointment on Thursday, Drew informed me (according to the BMI chart at the office) that I was not considered obese even at 40 weeks pregnant and having a fully formed human inside me.  The midwife promptly responded, "Oh, Drew, we don't calculate BMI on pregnant women."  I smiled.

-----

Friday, we decided to head to the Beach House for Papa's birthday and long walks.  (And we would be closer to the hospital.)

Day 3 overdue

Baby Moving

Happy Birthday, Papa!

"When Sparrows Fall"

Brett Merrick pastor of Reality Santa Barbara reflects on his 9 year-old daughter's fight with cancer and openly shares his struggles as she was diagnosed with cancer for the 4th time:

"When Sparrows Fall"

If you don't have time to listen to the 54 minute video, fast forward to the end (at 20 minutes left) and listen to Brett share about his struggles over the past 3 years.

Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.  Matthew 10:28-31

When studying the Bible about suffering, I've to found that God doesn't answer the question of "Why?" Instead, He points us to "Who".  Like with Job...or Lazarus.

Note: I wrote this post last week but never published it.  This morning when checking Daisy's blog, I found the following post:

At 2:40am this morning our sweet Daisy went to be with Jesus. She was sleeping and in no pain. Christ is with us as the God of all comfort. We are thankful.
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25-26)
Daisy believed this and so do we. More than ever.
Love,
The Merricks
(At this time funeral plans are still forthcoming. Please check back this week for more info and details.)

I have never met the Merrick family or attended a Reality service, but their honesty and transparency through their struggle has been inspiring.  Daisy's death comes at the beginning of lent when as Christians we reflect on the final days of Jesus leading up to his death and resurrection.  A time to ask ourselves: Do we really believe this?  Even in the death of a child.  A terminal diagnosis.  An unknown future.

And if we do believe John 11:25-26, are we bold enough to risk our reputation and friendships to tell and show others the hope we have received?

Let us not love with words or tongue but with in actions and in truth.  

1 John 3:18

Bringing dignity to the forgotten

When I hear a new song on the radio, I often find myself searching blogs and you tube for the meaning or inspiration for writing it.

Kings and Queens by Audio Adrenaline

Most of the imagery and meaning of the song can understood through listening to the lyrics or watching the video...but fast forward to minute 6 to hear Mark talk about what was going on 6 weeks prior to the filming.

Behind the scenes: making of the video

Read more about the Hands and Feet Project in Jacmel and Grand Grove, Haiti.

The passion and purpose behind Audio Adrenaline

Drew and I are surrounded by family and friends who have not lost sight of caring for those in need and bringing dignity to those who are forgotten in our culture.  Here's a short list (I apologize if I left you out):

Katie: slaves (sex and labor trafficked), women in developing countries (esp. the Congo), homeless, people living with physical disabilities...(I would classify these as her top 4.)

Parents: kids with a parent in prison (Angel Tree), foster care system (both through Royal Family Kids and CASA), AWANA, and kids in the neighborhood (Do you see the theme of reaching out to the youth?)

Rae and Holdford's: direct and organize the local branch of Royal Family Kids

Gabaree's: serve the local chapter of the Salvation Army

Several of our friends in Bible study mentor youth of all ages.  Not to forget many others that are serving in non-profit work both locally and overseas.

These people go above "expected" commitment and dedicate their time, resources, and money into these organizations and people.

It is our vision for our family that Callen (and lil' Mil) will grow and understand this level of sacrifice and commitment to the forgotten.  Sacrifice and commitment will be normal. Their willingness to serve will be inseparable from their character.

While this sounds good in a blog post and in theory, we know that the work begins behind closed doors: with how Drew and I interact with each other, our family, our friends, our neighbors.

A big task, but no one said that raising the next generation was easy.

"The Silence That Keeps Me Awake"

I wish I would have thought of this title, but I stole it from Del Tackett's blog (published Jan 20, 2011). For years I have noticed that my most "productive" thinking happens while trying to fall asleep or while driving...resulting in difficulty sleeping and distracted driving.

I like this song because the song

(1) breaks the silence on the regret, pain, healing, and forgiveness of abortion

(2) validates the pain that men experience when dealing with abortion  (Our culture seems to forget that men suffer and grieve the loss as well as women.)

(3) describes the story of a couple's journey to closure and healing

This video was not uploaded by Skillet and is not the official music video.

Skillet - Lucy (Lyrics)

Lead singer John Cooper tells the story behind Skillet's song "Lucy".  (The interview that I originally accessed over a year ago has been removed from You Tube, Air1, and Skillet blogs.)

Today marks the 40th anniversary of Roe v. Wade.  A Supreme Court decision that politicians thought would end the debate on abortion once and for all, like it had with integration.  But 40 years later, we look back at a nation still divided and struggling.

Since the decision in 1973, the Guttmacher Institute (AGI) and Center for Disease Control (CDC) estimate that over 50 million babies have been killed.  A disproportionate number of African American and Hispanic babies are killed compared to non-Hispanic White babies.   37% of women who have had abortions identify themselves as Protestant while 28% identify themselves as Catholic. Taking into account current and past rates, AGI estimates close to 1 in 3 women will have an abortion.*

Let that resonate with you. Nearly one-third of women!

Yet, the topic of abortion has largely remained out of the pulpit. Why?

Let us remember that to be silent is to act.  As Bonhoeffer said,

"Silence in the face of evil is itself evil: God will not hold us guiltless.  Not to speak is to speak.  Not to act is to act."

Lord, forgive us, the Church, for ignoring the truth surrounding abortion. For being quick to judge and not offer mercy and healing. Let us recognize that abortion isn't only a struggle for those outside the Church. Continue to rise a people among us who will speak out against this injustice. Remind us that "mercy TRIUMPHS over judgement." Amen.


* From a statistic summary on abort73.com, assessed Jan 2013. Most recent data available from 2009, released Nov 2012

"We can no longer plead ignorance..."

Closing argument of William Wilberforce's first attempt to abolish the slave trade in England (1789), emphasis mine:

Policy, Sir, is not my principle, and I am not ashamed to say it.  There is a principle above everything that is political.  And when I reflect on the command that says, "Thou shalt do not murder," believing the authority to be divine, how can I dare set up any reasonings of my own against it?  And, Sir, when we think of eternity, and of the future consequences of all human conduct, what is here in this life which should make any man contradict the principles of his own consciences, the principles of justices, the laws of religion, and of God?

Sir, the nature and all the circumstances of this Trade are now laid open to us.  We can no longer plead ignorance, we cannot evade it, it is now an object placed before us, we cannot pass it.  We may spurn it, we may kick it out of our way, but we cannot turn aside so as to avoid seeing it.  For it is brought now so directly before our eyes that his House must decide, and must justify to all the world, and to their own consciences, the rectitudes of their grounds and of the principles of their decision....Let no Parliament be the only body that is insensible to national justice.

Wilberforce's speech was considered one of his best, yet Parliament was unmoved.  Abolition failed.  Even after presenting Parliament with an 850 page document of testimonies and evidence, Parliament failed to see the trade for what it was.  Parliament's only decision that night was to "hear more evidence."  Meanwhile Parliament recessed for the summer and the horrors of the trade continued.

We know the outcome of Wilberforce's efforts: the slave trade was eventually abolished in England in 1807. But at the expense of his own health and thousands of Africans who continued to be kidnapped and worked until their death.  (Note: slavery still exists today in many forms, but Wilberforce's efforts signaled a change in society to no longer accept slavery as morally right or necessary for a healthy economy.)

It is meaningless to study history and not apply the lessons to my own culture and life.  So I'm left with this question:

What society ills am I ignoring because I am waiting to "hear more evidence"?

I have my ideas (but I'll save those for later).  Let us be a people that rise up and speak against injustice before it is accepted by the mainstream.  Let us be willingly to be persecuted and mocked for the sake of those who have no voice.

Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says...Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.  James 1: 22, 27

"We can no longer plead ignorance..." the stakes are too high.

Open my eyes, Lord, so that I may see.

"Don't be afraid," the prophet answered.  

"Those who are with us are more than those who are with them."

And Elisha prayed, "Open his eyes, Lord, so that he may see." 

Then the Lord opened the servant's eyes, 

and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.

2 Kings 6:16-17

Email subscribers, click for video.

Interview with Chris Tomlin explaining the meaning of the song

I know who goes before me
I know who stands behind 
The God of angel armies is always by my side
The One who reigns forever
He is a friend of mine

A Call to Be Intentional

“People do not drift toward Holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it tolerance; we drift toward disobedience and call it freedom; we drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indiscipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated.”

D.A. Carson in For the Love of God, volume 2

Merry Christmas!

Family Moments Holiday

Create photo holiday cards this Christmas season.

View the entire collection of cards.

Merry Christmas!  We hope your family has found a healthy balance of giving and receiving this Christmas season as you reflect on your trials and blessings throughout the year.  For us, we are continually trying to find a balance.  2012 has been an exciting year full of adventures, new traditions, laughs, and tears.

Drew is enjoying his work as a chemical analyst and the inorganics department manager at OEC, and Carlene is enjoying the opportunity to stay home to be with Callen.  Callen (2 in February) is growing quickly and absorbing every new observation.  He loves the outdoors, trucks and books, but most of all he loves to imitate Drew.  Whether it is cheering for the Seahawks or helping with projects, Callen is right next to him.

At the end of 2011, we purchased our first home!  We spent two months fixing and modernizing it before moving in February.  In between projects we have enjoyed hosting many dinner parties and overnight guests.  Callen loves the spaciousness of the backyard (still un-landscaped) and bird watching.

June was the most eventful month of the year, which brought two unexpected events into our lives: the death of Carlene’s Nana (93) and a positive pregnancy test.  Need less to say, the summer was filled with mix emotions as we grieved the death of Nana and embraced the change of a growing family.  Now that the sickness has passed, we have slowly started preparing for the baby, and anticipate its arrival in mid-February.

In November we made our first trip with Callen to the Pacific Northwest to visit Drew’s family.  Callen had an indescribable amount of fun playing with his cousins at Tyler and Alli’s and being spoiled with attention by Nana, Gramps and Aunt Crazy (Chelsey).  It has been over a month since the visit and he still talks about the trip, often repeating, “Miss you, cousins.”

Throughout this year we have been blessed by our family and friends who have overwhelmed us with help during our move and during the beginning months of pregnancy.  We are continually humbled by the love extended to us as we learn what it means to be parents, live in community and fulfill our purpose.

Please keep in touch with us throughout 2013 through email or snail mail.  If you are interested in watching our family grow, check our blog periodically and join the adventure as we attempt to become responsible parents, experience life’s trials and blessings, and begin to understand the full meaning of “till death do us part.”

Merry Christmas!

Drew, Carlene and Callen Miller

The Advent Book

Having parents that live close by (less than a 1/2 mile) has its advantages:
1)  You can call your mom for an all-purpose flour delivery when you discover in the middle of cooking and your child's nap that your flour is invested with bugs.

2)  They can come over on short notice when you are sick (morning sickness) and have them entertain your child.

3)  On rough days you can walk by for a quick change of scenery.

4)  You can swipe books from them when over for a quick lunch.

This is my latest steal (with permission, of course):

I couldn't find pictures of the inside, but it has been a perfect book for our young family to read.  Each day has a full-page door to open. Inside the door has a picture and brief paragraph about the Christmas story.

Since Callen LOVES books, he doesn't like reading one page a day or only opening one door.  We might have to read all previous days every night to compromise his desire to read the entire book every night.

Thanksgiving at the Beach

Happy 12/12/12 at 12:12pm!

You Are I Am

Waiting for some test results this weekend, a follow-up to some unusual numbers last week.  Most likely nothing serious, but regardless the news is unnerving. It has been a battle to take captive my thoughts.

So thankful that I live in a country that has access to medicine and diagnostic tests.

This song has been a good reminder of my weaknesses and who God is...regardless.

May I continue to move forward in His strength.

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To hear MercyMe talk about the meaning behind the song, click here.

Callen-isms

It is a privilege to stay home with Callen everyday.  Even on rough days I'm glad to be home with him.  Here are a few highlights over the past few days/weeks:

1) While I'm packing for our Thanksgiving trip, Cal is playing the master bathroom (shower to be exact).  "Hello.  Hi.  Heell-ooo."  I peak in to find his mouth on the bottom of the shower shouting into the drain.

2)  Again playing in the bathroom (usually the door is closed), I feel the "urge" to check on him.  On my way I hear the toilet flush.  I open the lid quickly, thrust my hand in the swirling water, and save the toys from clogging the drain.  Another reason to keep the toilet clean: you never know when you'll be on a rescue mission for toys.

3) He sings the "ABCs"....A  B C D (pause) F G...then repeats and counts...slowly 4  5 (pause)...quickly...8  9 10

4)  Air-big = airplane; good morning, mama = moring, ma-ma

5)  Cal playing quietly in another room used to equal trouble, but now quiet equals playing contently.  Its when I hear "safe" or "safe now" that I quickly see what he is doing.  He likes to climb on things and I remind him that its not safe.  So when he is climbing he repeats "safe" either as a question or trying to affirm to himself that it is safe.

6) Yesterday's call from his crib to tell us he is ready to get up: "DREWY!  MA-MA! Daytime. Out. Yah."

Spending so much time with him allows me to predict what he is doing without even seeing him.